Semantic Nonsense: Best of Summer Games Done Quick ’21

Another summer, another big fundraiser for Doctors Without Borders. While $2.9 million didn’t set an all-time record, it easily took the top spot of GDQ’s purely online events.

I don’t think anybody’s going to complain about a donation with that many digits, anyway.

While my SDGQ viewing was limited by a dastardly daylong power outage, the show must go on. Here’s my customary list of runs that I enjoyed, and I think you’ll enjoy, too.

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Super Mario 64 (70 stars) Blindfolded by Bubzia

While I infamously don’t enjoy Super MArio 64, I am a sucker for blindfolded runs. And despite my bizarre tastes, I can immediately recognise the crazy amount of skill this takes. It’s really something to see from start to finish, so clear your calendar.

And to add to it all, the runner — in a marathon setting — gets a new personal best. What’s not to love here?

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Mega Man X2 by Luiz Miguel

Are you looking for an execution-heavy speedrun with no crazy glitches or skips? Are you tired of seeing the first Mega Man X over and over in marathons? Do you experience feelings of dread in your basement or attic?

If the answer is yes, then don’t wait another minute. This is the run for you.

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Ghosts ‘N Goblins Resurrection by TheMexicanRunner

This was my first look at this gorgeous new entry in the G ‘n G series, and what a look. The speedrun is constantly going off the rails, but TheMaxicanRunner somehow plows on through while constantly on the verge of a panic attack. In a SGDQ featuring two Souls games, this might actually be the most punishing run of the event.

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GeoGuessr by havrd

There’s always a few games I’ve never heard of on the schedule, and I lucked out by picking this one to check out.

The premise of the game is unique; it dropped you into Google Maps street view in a random part of the world, and you have to guess where you are by selecting a point on the world map. The closer you get to the actual location, the higher the score.

An insane challenge made all the more insane by the runner challenging for a perfect score, which required he pin the map within 185m of the actual location five times. You wouldn’t think a game about searching a map will be wild, but it’s all on the runner’s incredible knowledge. In the first 3 seconds of seeing the first location he casually rattles off, “So this is Turkey,” and of course it is. It takes a lot work and clue gathering to pinpoint the exact spot, but those initial steps just knock my socks off.

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Zoda’s Revenge: Startropics II by thetantalus

This one is here because I stan the Startropics series. And I will get you on board.

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Let’s Give Up by MrMightyMouse

It wouldn’t be a GDQ without (multiple) Kaizo romhack(s), and Let’s Give Up is a fantastic option that showcases the ridiculous amounts of cape techniques present in Super Mario World.

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DANCERUSH STARDOM by Eijiken

SGDQ made lemonade out of having to do marathons remotely. Not only did they take advantage by featuring a lot of runners who would otherwise not be able to make the trip to wherever the convention would have been, but they also did by featuring games that are unreasonably to impossibly cumbersome to stage.

Case in point: Arcade dance machine known as DANCERUSH STARDOM. Streamed from an actual arcade, no less.

It was a blast to see the elaborate control mechanism, and Eijiken may have given the best performance in the whole marathon. With his smooth, athletic moves and his infectious joy for the game — and apparently also for swiffer brooms — this run was a delight from start to finish.

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maimai FiNALE by Starrodkirby86

One good giant rhythm game you’d never see at a regular event deserves another, right?

This exhibition run starts slow so you can see how the game comes together, then blows right past any possible hope of comprehension as the game starts blasting Starrodkirby86 with demands for inputs that he, somehow, stays on top of. For an hour and a half.

If you want to see something new and something absolutely bonkers, here’s your segment.

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The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages by GlyphDX

“Overlooked Zelda game” is a rare phrase that is all too often said of the mobile Zeldas. So try to make up for it by watching an impressive speedrun that is for all intents and purposes 90 minutes of setup for a major skip glitch that takes us to the ending, with a lot of other fun and tricky shenanigans along the way.